


On Not Giving a Shit

by OneLetteredWonder



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - Dance, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Nyotalia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-09
Updated: 2016-11-09
Packaged: 2018-08-29 23:13:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 10,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8509273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OneLetteredWonder/pseuds/OneLetteredWonder
Summary: Lovino doesn't care about a lot of things. Not if he's late to class or if he's home at odd hours or about anything really. Especially not about the girl with long blonde hair and bright purple eyes and a smile just for him. No. He doesn't care.





	1. Her eyes, that's where hope lies

If you asked him, Lovino might tell you that he has the best reputation in school. No one expects anything from him, and none of the teachers do much if he's late to class. No one picks on him and not many people talk to him either. In reality, Lovino will probably just say that it doesn't matter to him what kind of reputation he has. Further proving that he doesn't give a shit.

It's not that he doesn't care about anything. He has to care about some things. He cares for his grades. He needs to keep them up so he can go to a nice school far away from this tiny town with as little of expense as possible. He does do good in school, he just doesn't show up on time some days. The teachers have questioned him before about it. He just shrugs his shoulders and tells them he couldn't be bothered with coming in at the right time. His grades don't suffer from it. He always knows the material. He reads ahead when he's bored.

He cares about his family. He makes sure his brothers are eating enough and eating right. Without his guidance they would probably only eat pasta. Fruits are nice things too. He makes sure his brothers get to school on time and makes it home safe. Most days. Some days he lets them go off on their own. He hasn't gotten yelled at for it yet. He makes sure his grandpa is doing alright and has enough to keep him busy for the day before he goes to school. The old man raised them mostly, so Lovino makes sure he's now in good condition. Even if his grandpa is a bit odd.

He cares for himself too. He doesn't really care if it makes him sound selfish. He takes care of himself first. If he's unhappy with something, he will say so and make it change. If he's annoyed with something, he will leave the room or point it out. He's lost a few friends because of his attitude, but he figures they can't be all that worth it if they can't handle the real him. It's not that big a deal to him if he doesn't have people to hang out with after school. He's fine on his own. He tends to give off a vibe he doesn't like people, which isn't true. He doesn't particularly care for their existence. They really don't matter to him.

He's putting his stuff away after school. The day had been boring and long and now he just wants to take a nap. He flips through a notebook, checking for anything that might be needed later that day. He grimaces. There's nothing new. He's read ahead in every class and knows the material. He could probably skip class for a straight week and be completely fine. His grades for attendance would suffer then, and he probably wouldn't be able to come up with a good enough excuse to pull that off. He can't really be bothered with an extensive lie either. He groans.

There's a light scuffling from the end of the hallway. Most of the kids have left by now, excited by the idea of getting out of class and going home for the weekend. Lovino didn't bother rushing out. He would get home eventually. There's not much to do at home anyway, so there's not rush for him. He glances to the side to see a boy and girl walking his direction. He turns back to his locker. He flips through another notebook just in case. He decides it's pointless and puts his things away. He slams the locker.

He turns on his heel and is immediately pushed back against the lockers. He winces at the pain of the lock digging into his back. The clatter of books dropping sound around him. Closing his eyes, he bites the inside of his lip and counts to ten. His time is knocked out of his head by a laugh. He opens his eyes to glare at the boy from earlier, pointing at him and laughing. He's a big kid, a junior or sophomore, Lovino doesn't care. The boy catches his unamused expression and his smile slips from his face. He takes off running down the hallway. Lovino is positive if they were to actually get into a fight, the other boy would win. He's bigger and Lovino doesn't work out like others do. He could never be bothered enough to keep up with a workout schedule. His body is fine the way it is.

He takes a deep breath and looks down. Staring up at him are bright purple eyes blinking in confusion and concern. He takes the girls shoulders in his hands and pushes her back. She continues to stare at him, then burst out in an 'oh!' and drops to her knees. Lovino steps out of her way, avoiding her papers as she picks them up.

"I'm so sorry about that. Carlos can be mean sometimes, and I'm sorry he pushed me into you," the girl rambles on, scraping her books into her lap. Lovino raises an eyebrow at her. She shouldn't really be apologizing for someone else's actions. It hadn't been her fault some asshole thought it'd be funny to push her. He turns away from her wordlessly. He can still hear her fumbling with her papers.

"Ah WAIT!" He pauses in his strides. He steps back to be halfway facing the girl, still on the floor. She has her hand reached out to him. She pulls back once he's looking at her, his neutral resting bitch face back in place. She fumbles with her fingers.

"I'm sorry, again, for running into you," She smiles gently at him. Lovino just stares at her. No one should apologize that much. Her eyes are like an open book, giving away her sincere feelings. They are expressive and sparkling at him. He bites his tongue. With a shrug, he faces the exit once more and leaves. He doesn't look back to her, a small part of him wishes he did. Her eyes had been beautiful.


	2. Let your hair down

Lovino bangs his head on his locker the following week. He's annoyed to say the least. He hits his head until it starts to really hurt. He lets out a low groan. He spent the whole weekend thinking about that girl and her eyes. It seemed no matter what he did he felt reminded of their color and shape and the way they told him exactly what she felt. No one has eyes that gorgeous and he's annoyed. He couldn't do much without having to stop and tear at his hair for thinking about them. He's pissed.

He bangs his head once more as the minute bell warning him to get to class sounds out through the hall. He finally opens his locker. He knew he should have looked through his stuff more. He finds a slip of paper detailing a mini report due his last hour. He hasn't done it. He sighs and slams his locker shut with more force than he usually uses. He hides in the bathroom. Not caring for germs he hoists himself up onto the counter. He takes out his work and starts on his report. It's easy, he knows what he's talking about, and it's completed ten minutes before the class he skipped ends. He debates actually going to the last of the class. It's pointless though.

He hops down off the counter and leaves the bathroom. He stops short outside. The girl that got pushed into him is at a locker of her own. She talking quietly with a girl in Lovino's grade, Julchen. He doesn't particularly care for Julchen when she's talking. She's loud and never really figured out what boundaries are. He watches from his position leaning up against the wall. Julchen takes one of the red ribbons from the girls hair, tugging it so her blonde pigtail come loose around her shoulder. Lovino can hear the girl squeak in protest. Julchen takes this time to ruffle the girls hair further before running off down the hallway cackling like crazy. Lovino rolls his eyes.

The girl takes out the other pigtail, now ruined by Julchen's grabby hands. Lovino kicks off the wall and walks up to her. He doesn't know why he does, but he feels like talking to her, so he's going to. She's got a small brush in her hands, working it through her long hair. His hands are in his pockets to keep himself from twitching. He leans up against the row of lockers next to her with a small clang. She jumps slightly.

"Hey," He says. He watches her. She blinks at him, those damn eyes. He can see the confusion on her face, then it lights up.

"Oh, hello," She says politely, still brushing out her hair. Lovino wonders why she cares so much about the order of her hair. He rolls his eyes at himself, she can do whatever she wants.

"I'm Lovino," He tells her. He's keeping his voice even as possible. He's not nervous, but he'd rather not take his usual bitter tone when there's no need to. She smiles at him.

"Madeline. Sorry, again, about running into you," She grimaces slightly. Lovino rolls his eyes and waves off the apology. It's not her fault. He stares forward now, his head back against the lockers.

"It wasn't your fault." He tells her. She giggles slightly. He glances at her from the corner of his eye. She working the ribbon around a section of her hair.

"Are you new here? Never really seen you before," He scrunches up his face slightly. She nods in answer to his question. She sticks her tongue out slightly as she ties the bow.

"I recently moved with my dad since he got remarried. My step sister already goes here," She flashes him a quick smile. Lovino goes back to looking at the lockers.

"Who's your step sister?" He asks, keeping up the light conversation. He glances at her again. Her smiles twitches just a little.

"Amelia Jones," It's Lovino's turn to twitch. He knows Amelia, they are in the same grade. Her and Julchen hang out a lot, and they are both equally annoying. He sighs.

"I know her, you two are nothing alike. Thank fucking god." He rolls his eyes. Madeline giggles into her hand. She's running the brush through the other half of her hair, taking her time in getting her pigtails right.

"She's not all that bad," She tells him with a smile on her face. Lovino doesn't look away. Her bright eyes are sparkling again.

"Are you related to Feliciano?" She asks suddenly, turning to face him. She blinks at him. He twitches again. Of course Feliciano would come up in conversation.

"Yeah he's my younger brother." He digs his head back into the lockers. She hums in response.

"You two aren't alike either. I worry for him," she pouts to herself. She ties up the half of her hair. Lovino watches her hands work.

"Why?" His face twists up in confusion. Partly because she's worried for his brother, who is the happiest son of a bitch ever, and he finds himself thinking that a frown doesn't fit her face. She shakes her head twice in the mirror before snapping it shut. She closes her locker softly.

"Because he's so happy," She faces him fully. He's a bit taken aback by her words. No one really worries for Feliciano except for him. She smiles widely at him when the bells rings. She takes a step back away from him.

"It was nice talking to you Lovino," Her smile is soft and bright and Lovino is annoyed. He bangs his head back against the lockers. No one has the right to be that soft and nice. He grumbles and heads to his last hour class. He gets there on time even. He practically throws his shabby made in an hour report at the teacher then slumps in his desk. There's no real reason for him to even be in class anymore. He debates taking a nap instead.

He sits glaring at the open notebook in front of him. There are no notes on the page because he's already taken notes on the chapter and the teacher is going too slow for him. He's only opened the notebook to make it look like he's taking notes anyway. He picks up his pencil and doodles. Anything to get his mind off of those stupid purple eyes. He draws a few circles, a couple lines, and plenty of curls and waves. His eyes widen in horror. He grabs the paper and rips it out of the notebook. He crumbles it up hastily. He shoves it into his backpack and faces the teacher like he's been paying attention the entire time. The class is looking at him weirdly but he ignores them. He's annoyed.

After school he's putting his things away. He finds the crumpled up piece of paper near the bottom. He takes it out and flattens it. His sketch of Madeline is looking back at him. He growls, crumpling it back up and shoving in his locker. He slams it shut with more force than necessary. He swivels around and drops back against his locker in shock. Madeline is standing right behind him, her eyes open wide at his sudden turnabout. He releases a deep breath.

"Are you alright?" She asks, taking a step closer. Lovino sighs and runs a hand through his hair.

"Yeah I just.. Fuck." Is all he manages to say. Madeline giggles and opens her mouth to say something more, but her name is called. She flicks her head to the side, her hair swirling around her shoulders. She waves down the hallway. Lovino follows her motion. Amelia, Julchen, and Michaela are waiting at the end of the hallway. Madeline steps away from him, giving him another one of those soft gentle smiles he has a hard time believing she's actually letting him see. He watches with a neutral expression as she joins up with her step sister and her friends. With another growl he opens his locker up, grabs the crumpled piece of paper, and slams his locker shut again.

He's banging doors when he gets home. He's not even trying to be quiet. Their grandpa could probably sleep through an earthquake anyway. Lovino stomps upstairs and throws his door closed. He takes the paper he's tortured and flattens it out once again. He clenches his teeth tight. It doesn't look right. Even if it hadn't been crumpled, it still wouldn't look right. He takes out a few spare pieces of sketch paper and tries again, much to his own annoyance.

He's soon surrounded by sketches with the edges bent from his grip on them. He throws his pencil down on the table. Every time he's tried, something comes out wrong. The smile isn't sweet enough, or the eyes don't sparkle the way he sees them, or the hair doesn't have the right amount of curl or too much. Before he can be bothered to erase his mistakes, he gets frustrated and bends the paper, which annoys him more. He groans and smacks his head on the table. There's a knock. He raises his head as Feliciano enters the room.

"Fratello are you okay? Grandpa said you came home in a whirlwind, slamming doors," Feliciano closes the door behind him softly. He enters the room and takes a seat on the floor opposite of Lovino. Lovino sighs and sits up straighter, running a hand through his hair.

"Yeah fine," He says in response. He's not fine. He's pissed. He stands and shakes to get rid of some of his angry energy. Feliciano pouts.

"Someone in my class asked about you today," He says with a smile, trying to maybe cheer up his brother. Lovino gives him an irritated expression. Why should he care what Feliciano's classmates think of him? Feliciano nods his head with a pleased 'mhmm' when he notices Lovino looking at him.

"Madeline said you're sweet, even though everyone else told her she was wrong," Feliciano nods his head in a final like manner. Lovino makes a conscious effort to breath.

"Madeline.. Said that?" He runs a hand through his hair again. He's briefly caught up in thinking about why she would say that he misses the baffled expression Feliciano is giving him.

"Do you know Madeline? She's real nice," Feliciano is smiling widely at him. Lovino goes back to glaring. He clenches his teeth as he realizes Feliciano is sitting obliviously surrounded by his failed attempts at drawing her. He comes over and starts to gather the papers.

"No I don't." It's a total lie and Feliciano notices it. He glances at the papers before they are ripped from his view. He giggles and takes a spare one that hasn't be ruined. He takes the pencil and begins to mark up the paper. Lovino sits on his bed, ruined sketches beside him. He knows what Feliciano is doing and all he can do is watch his brother's smiling face as he concentrates on drawing. Lovino has long gotten over the fact Feliciano can draw better than him. He taught Feliciano everything he knew and then his brother just happened to be better. No big deal.

He got over it. They each took their share of arts. Feliciano is better at material arts. Painting, drawing, sculpting. Lovino is better at physical arts. Singing, playing, dancing. He likes dancing most. It's freeing and energy consuming. Perfect for when he's pissed or can't get his thoughts straight. Now is one of those times. Feliciano sits back, makes a few more marks, then sits back again. He pouts at the paper, makes another line or two, and smiles up at Lovino. He holds the paper in front of his face so he can peek over the top.

It's times like this that make Lovino hate and love his brother's art talent. The sketch of Madeline is perfect. The smile is gentle and sweet and the eyes are sparkling. The waves and curls of her hair fall gently around her shoulders like they did earlier that day. Fucking damnit. Feliciano giggles and places the sketch on the table. He stands and fucking skips to the door.

"Oh yeah! I came up here to tell you I'm making lasagna for dinner!" With that Feliciano is gone. Lovino hasn't removed his eyes from the sketch now on the mini table. He reaches out and take it in his hands to study it closer. He takes a deep breath. He pushes off the bed and pins the picture to his cork board. He swivels around and turns on his stereo. He doesn't care how loud the music is, he just needs to remove some tension.


	3. I got to see your sweet smile

Once again Lovino is banging his head on his locker. He's spent the past week snapping his head in any direction he thinks he sees Madeline. It pisses him off so much. He doesn't get why he wants to see her and it annoys him so much. He has seen her throughout the week. A few passing glances and a wave or two. He likes seeing her, and it makes him angry to know he looks forward to seeing someone. What's the point of that?

"Fuck," He says with another bang on the lockers. He glares at nothing in particular. "Fuck? Fuck! Fuck fucking fuckers fucking fuckery fuck." He slowly turns in a circle to lean against the cool of the metal behind him. He closes his eyes and places a hand on his face. He hears the soft giggling first. He peeks through his fingers to see Madeline coming closer to him. She's covering her mouth. She takes a spot next to him against the lockers. Lovino stares at her incredulously. She stops for a moment and peers up at him. She bursts back into a fit of giggles. Sure people have laughed before as his 'fuck' tirades, but no one fucking giggled. Madeline calms herself down.

"How are you today?" She asks sweetly, leaning her head up to see him. Lovino sighs and bangs his head on the locker, trying hard not to look at her. He ignores the happiness he feels seeing her, and also so ignores the annoyance at the happiness.

"Fine enough. You?" She hums at his answer. He bites his tongue. He said that a bit more angry that he would have liked, but Madeline seems to ignore it.

"Oh I'm doing dandy," She says smiling at him. He glares at the floor. With a deep breath he looks at her. Her hair is back in those pigtails making blonde waterfalls over her shoulders. Her glances down at the binders in her arms. He scowls a bit at the paper sticking out with a few lines scratched on it. He reaches over and takes it from it's place. Madelines squeaks and reaches out for it, but he turns away from her to keep it out of her hands. He could recognize Feliciano's penmanship anywhere.

He raises an eyebrow at himself sketched onto the paper. He's glaring at the side, his typical neutral scowl on his face. He peers over his shoulder at Madeline now. She's hiding her face behind her binders, but Lovino can see the tips of her ears turning red. He holds out the paper back to her.

"Why do you have this?" He asks with as level of a voice as he can manage. Madeline peeks over her books. She's cringing slightly.

"I saw Feliciano drawing during class. I asked if it was you, he said yes, and when he finished he gave it to me.." She trails off, taking the paper gingerly in her hand once again. She places it on top of her books. Lovino doesn't react at first. Of course it would Feliciano's doing. He takes a deep breath and spins on his heel. He can hear Madeline make a noise of protest behind him but he can't stay there. He grits his teeth and bangs a fist on the lockers. He stomps his way over to the music room.

He throws open the door. Elizabeta, Roderich, and Carmen are there. Carmen jumps from her spot and waltzes over to him. She throws her arms around him in a hug and he tries to push her off.

"Fucking stop, look I need. I need your help. Do you know any tango type songs?" He manages to get Carmen off him. Her face twists up into absolute puzzlement. Elizabeta and Roderich share a look of confusion as well. Lovino gulps hard and keep his expression stern. Carmen is the first to react, spinning around and rifling through her music. Lovino throws his bag into a corner and approaches them. There's a brief discussion and then they have a song ready. Lovino shakes his head of his thoughts and takes a position in the middle of the room. Roderich takes his violin and Carmen picks at her guitar. A quick beat from Elizabeta on the drums and the song starts.

Lovino has many times danced by himself in his room. He's moved all his stuff out of the way and made space. It's cramped. Here there is space for him to twist and move without worrying about running into anything. He can feel the air in him coming out quick. He feels alive dancing with himself. His arms are up like he has a partner and he moves seamlessly. He's done this dance many times. Although it doesn't quite match up with the song his makeshift band is playing, it doesn't matter. His thoughts are clearing up and he feels better.

He strikes a pose at the end, like he always does. He's breathing heavily. Carmen comes up to him and grabs his hands excitedly telling him how amazing that had been to watch. Elizabeta and Roderich say the same. Then he hears clapping. He snaps his head to the door to see Feliciano and Madeline there applauding. He gulps. He says a quick thank you to the music players for complying to his hasty request. He snatches his bag and makes his way over to his brother. Madeline gets to him first.

"That was so amazing! Can you teach me to dance like that?" Any words Lovino had in him disappear. He blinks down at Madeline. Her bright eyes are shining and he grits his teeth. He finds himself nodding. Madeline's face lights up and she hugs Lovino quickly. She runs off. Lovino watches her leave with a stunned expression on his face. He blinks slowly, trying to process what just happened. He barks at Feliciano to shut up when he hears him laughing.


	4. I wanna dance with somebbody

It starts snowing the day Lovino told Madeline he would teach her to dance. He's not a super huge fan of the cold. He does like getting warm though, so that's a plus for colder weather. He rubs at his shoulder on his way over to the music room. It's empty. He talked to Carmen after his impromptu play music for me moment. She said they are in there mostly everyday except for Wednesdays for sure. So that's the day he decided he could teach Madeline to dance. He ignores the feelings in him.

He opens the door and takes a deep breath. He throws his things to the side. He changed into more appropriate dancing clothes just before his last hour started. He traded his jeans and boots for sweats and tennis shoes. His long sleeve he traded in for a simple black t-shirt. He stretches out his arms. He's not nervous. He's more so curious. He's never taught anyone to dance before. He knows he'd probably get too irritated with them during the course of teaching. He didn't want to do that, even if they eventually got sick of his careless attitude. He rolls his shoulders when Madeline comes stumbling in.

He glances at her. The jeans she wore earlier are now a pair of yoga pants and her pigtails and pulled tighter on her head. She's wearing a simple white t-shirt. Lovino ignores the bubble of feelings in his chest. She smiles widely at him and drops her stuff near his.

"Hi, thank you for teaching me," She comes over to him. Lovino grimaces slightly. He doesn't know how this will work out.

"Yeah well, never taught anyone before," He waves her over to the center of the room. She follows with that stupid bright smile still on her face. He stands straighter and holds out a hand to her. She takes it without hesitation and steps up to him. He's hit with the sudden realization that Madeline will be really close to him. He changes his mind.

"Ah, I need to teach you the girls part," He holds her still and stands next to her, mentally running through his head the steps the girl usually takes. He explains that tango is a bit fast paced, and there are a lot of steps. She nods her head enthusiastically. He dances the steps out slowly for her, telling her exactly where to place her feet as he does. She copies him, a small crease in her brow in concentration.

Lovino is pleased to find she can follow his instruction easily. He'd have a hard time if she didn't understand him. She picks up on the steps quickly. Lovino is nearly smiling at the sight of her learning the dance. She stumbles a bit over a few of the trickier foot work pieces, but for the most part she's graceful and fluid.

"Have you ever danced before?" He asks her during a small break. Madeline shrugs, taking a quick sip of her water.

"No I've ice skated though," she smiles at him. He hides his gulp by drinking his water. That explains the smoothness of her motions. They run through the steps a few more times before Lovino calls it a day, too much practice can make you mess up more. Madeline pulls up her boots and wiggles into her red hoodie. Lovino takes a moment to lace up his own boots over his sweats. He pushes off the ground and shakes to release any last tension from his muscles. He stops thinking when Madeline hugs him quickly again.

"Thank you for teaching me Lovino, see you next week," She's walking towards the door, waving over her shoulder at him. He blinks after her. He shakes his head violently. This is not happening. He doesn't really care that she wants to learn to dance and he doesn't really care that she likes it. It's no matter to him that she asked him to teach her. It's nothing. He shoulders his bag and walks quickly home.


	5. Only left with my own jealousy

Lovino is leaning up against his locker, totally not watching Madeline. He also didn't stop in whatever he was doing during the week to stare at her. It's also not creepy shut the fuck up. It doesn't help that Madeline notices half the time, stopping what she's doing to smile at him. It annoys him. It makes him happy. It annoys him that he's happy. He bangs his head back on the locker.

She's talking to some person he doesn't know. He doesn't really care to know either. They're tall and wearing a long scarf around their neck. Madeline is chatting easily with them. Lovino is not jealous. He has no reason to be. What would be the point of being jealous over someone he doesn't know, doesn't care about, talking to someone he also doesn't care about. He rolls his eyes and heads to class on time for once, getting there almost early.

He bites on his pencil during class. He's supposed to be teaching Madeline more dance steps today. He bites harder when he finds himself wondering who she talked to earlier. It's stupid. Who cares who she talks to. She can talk to anyone she wants. Lovino sighs.

He doesn't have many friends. He knows that. It's pretty obvious. Most people get pushed away from his 'don't give a shit' attitude. He used to have friends, but they got nit picky and gossipy and he couldn't do it. That scene just hadn't been for him. He started to find a lot of things didn't matter. No big deal. Just how things played out for him.

One of those things just happened to be his romantic life. Not that he didn't want to hold someone's hand or talk to them after a long day. He just didn't find someone he could do that with. He's had chances of course. Chances that he almost accepted then rejected at the last second. The first had been Carmen. She came in like a tornado to his life. She had liked him despite everything and that had been new for him. Someone who liked him despite his neutral angry self. He had nearly liked her back, but she kept going off about how cute he always acted, even if something really upset him. She couldn't see the difference between his real anger and his outer pissed off mood. He couldn't do that.

Then came Julchen. He tried to listen and hear her out. The more she talked the more he grimaced though. She really liked his devil may care attitude, wanting to pull pranks with him and have fun. He liked the idea of that. However, that's all she seemed to really care about. There could be no seriousness with that. Plus she never shut up. Amelia showed up soon after. And he had really wanted to like her. She could have fun and be serious, but then she let it slip how cool it'd be to date the bad boy of the school and Lovino cut that off that immediately. She just wanted to date him for his reputation that he never even asked for.

He nearly couldn't think of a response when Lars asked him on a date. He and Lars barely talked, and when they did it never felt normal, kind of forced interaction. He couldn't for the life of him see why Lars liked him. He didn't really like him either. So he had to say no. He wouldn't date someone he didn't like. That wouldn't be fair to either of them. Lovino isn't that mean.

He drags himself out of his seat when the bell rings. He's so close to being able to dance. He just needs to get there. He rolls his shoulders when he gets out of the classroom. He shoves his things in his locker like always. He freezes when he turns around. Madeline is there talking to that same tall dude with the scarf. He's playing with the ends of the scarf, his face red. Lovino watches with a bored expression. Madeline brings a hand to her mouth. She shakes her head. The tall boy looks to the ground. They each say something else, then the tall boy is looking right at him.

Lovino keeps his face blank. The tall boy stares at him, judging him. He says something else that makes Madeline puff up in a blush. The tall boy smiles down at her and hugs her. Lovino will deny that his blood boiled. The other boy pulls away, a smile on his face and waving down the hallway. Lovino moves then. He heads to the bathroom to change out of his winter ready clothes for something looser for dancing.

Madeline is already in the room when he gets there. She greets him with a smile and he flippantly waves his hand in response. He throws his stuff in the corner.

"Let's go over what you remember from last time," He says. She skips on over to him and they line up together. Madeline remembers a lot of what they covered. It's simple to reteach the parts she couldn't get the hang of. She smiles brightly at him.

"Can we try it together now?" The question makes Lovino pause. He glares at the ground.

"I guess so." He mumbles out. He backs away and taps out a few steps for the part he's supposed to dance. He doesn't want to accidentally start doing the girls part after doing it for so long. He waves her closer. She giggles in excitement and steps up to him. He takes a deep breath and guides her hands to the proper positions, one hand on his shoulder the other in his. He places a hand on her waist and stands proud. He counts out a slow beat, wanting to keep it easy for her. They both watch their feet as they move across the floor. Madeline is biting her lip and smiling. Lovino can't keep his eyes off her. There's a bit of a confusion near the end and toes are almost stepped on but they get It. Madeline looks up to him, her eyes sparkling. Lovino bites his tongue.

She pulls away and spins in a circle, her blonde hair twirling around her. Lovino runs a hand through his hair. Madeline pulls him close for a hug. Lovino freezes, the air leaving him. It takes a conscious effort to hug her back. She's warm against him. She pulls back to face him.

"Can we do it again?" She asks sweetly. How could he say no to that. He sighs and pulls her back to the center of the floor. He counts out a quicker beat this time. Madeline stumbles just a little, still watching her feet. Halfway through she gets confident, looking away from her feet and laughing. Lovino clenches his teeth. He's not sure if it's the dancing or the way she's smiling at him that's causing his heart to race the way it is. He'll blame the dancing.

The end of the steps come and Madeline bites her lip in concentration to remember the footwork. She fumbles a little but Lovino catches her, bringing her flush up against him on accident. She smiles for him. He's stuck in his spot. Her eyes are bright and regarding him so sweetly. He doesn't move, and doesn't let her go. There's a brief panic in his head. What is he doing? The smile on Madeline's face falls away slowly, her expression changing to concern. Lovino bites the inside of his lip. He lets go of her hand and runs it through her hair. He pulls her close quickly and kisses her deeply. Madeline lets out a squeak.

He pulls away sharply at that. He lets out a huff of breath. Shit. He steps away from her without a word. She just stands there and watches him as he gathers his things, not bothering to put on his winter clothes, and exits with a bang of the door. Lovino is surprised he doesn't run home. He shouldn't have done that. It was stupid. He shouldn't be caring so much about this. About her. He doesn't. It had been because of that dance he did what he did. He didn't really like her. He was caught in the moment. Or at least that's what he tells himself.


	6. The snow kisses her cheek

He's not avoiding her. He's not. He's simply going about his life and his daily schedule. Sure he may be going to class earlier than he normally would, and may be not standing at his locker longer than he usually does. He may have also skipped the day he and Madeline have chosen for dancing. That doesn't mean anything though. He does take a moment to bang his head against his locker before heading to class. He's in desperate need for a distraction.

History however is almost worse. Now he just wants a distraction from class. His mind wanders to the one thing he's been trying desperately not to think about, because it doesn't matter. It doesn't really matter the way Madeline felt in his arms, warm and soft. It doesn't really matter that her smile is bright and sweet and Lovino has never really received such a gentle expression in his life. That doesn't matter at all. It also doesn't matter the way her eyes sparkle when she looks at him. She probably looks at everyone that way. It's just in her nature really, to be soft and kind and fucking perfect.

Lovino bites his tongue hard. This doesn't really matter. He had a brief friendship with someone he barely knows and doesn't care to get to know. This is not a big deal. People come and go all the time and this is no different. He sighs. He's never cared for much in his life. Very few things have ever captured his care long enough to be important. His friends, when they still wanted to hang out, he had cared for them. When they stopped wanting to be friends, he stopped caring for them. It didn't hurt as much as he thought it would. This though, is making his stomach sick, and he's annoyed by it.

He jolts in his seat when the bell rings. He leans back in his chair and waits for his classmates to leave before he does. He's got no where to be and it's a Friday. He can afford to take it slow this time around. He mindlessly packs up his things. He exits the classroom. A small part of him hopes he didn't stop too long in the doorway to be noticeable. Madeline is standing by his locker, fiddling with her fingers. He walks up to her with a neutral expression. She jumps a little when she sees him.

"Lovino.." He grits his teeth and opens his locker. No one has the right to sound that sad. He glances at her. She's staring at him with an understanding expression that puts him on edge. He goes back to glaring into his locker.

"Please talk to me, it's kind of sucked not being able to talk to you," She tells him and he slams his locker shut with more force than he intended. It makes her jump. He regards her coldly even if all of his instincts are screaming at him to hold her tight. He doesn't care.

"Why?" Is all he asks her. She blinks and looks down at the ground. Lovino waits for her to respond. She's scuffing her boots against the tile.

"Well, I thought we were friends. I like talking to you." Lovino inhales sharply. Madeline peeks up at him, her purple eyes doing nothing to mask her concern for him. He closes his eyes tight. This isn't a thing. This isn't happening. He opens his eyes. Madeline is just a hint closer to him. Lovino takes a step away. He's not scared and it doesn't hurt to see the pain in Madeline's eyes. It doesn't matter. Her turns away swiftly and walks home. His thoughts are racing.

Back at his house he stomps upstairs. Feliciano questions him and he ignores the calls of his name. He can't do this. He slams his door shut and locks the door. He puts his CD into the machine and cranks it loud. He dances to the music, letting it fill him up. The distraction works until his mind puts Madeline dancing in his arms. He trips over his feet and catches himself on the small table. He's breathing heavily. He starts the song over again. He gets halfway through till his mind shows him Madeline smiling up at him. He stops and kicks the small table.

"FUCK," He yells out. He runs his hands haphazardly through his hair. He doesn't care. He doesn't. It doesn't matter that Madeline likes being with him and talking to him and went out of her way to be near him. It doesn't matter. They're friends. Or they were. Lovino kicks the table again. He glances his cork board. He stomps over and rips the picture from it's pin. He stumbles back to his bed and stares down at the picture of Madeline. He doesn't care.

He places the paper in his lap and digs his palms into his eyes. He rests his elbows on his knees and breathes slowly. He doesn't care that she smiles at him. He doesn't care that her purple eyes are now his new favorite color. It doesn't matter that he may have hurt her. She's just another person. Just another face around the school. It doesn't matter. He doesn't care.

He takes a deep breath and feels the soft tears pricking at his eyes. He grits his teeth together. He stands and kicks the table one more time. His feet stomp downstairs and his hands yank on his hoodie. He tugs his boots on tight. Feliciano asks him where he's going, he just responds by slamming the front door shut. The snow crunches underneath his footsteps. He doesn't walk quickly. He'll get there eventually. It's giving him time to think of what to say. Sorry comes first. Then maybe an explanation of his trying not to care too much. Maybe it is to protect himself. He's never needed it before. Maybe he's just careful. He doesn't know. Madeline probably will. Next he'll tell her about the way he feels when she smiles at him. Fuck.

He cares. He cares so damn much about someone he just met a month ago and it pisses him off. How did someone he barely see get under his skin so much. How did some random girl manage to confuse him and make him so happy just by seeing her. He grits his teeth. He's annoyed by how much he wants to apologize. It annoys him so much that he didn't just talk to her about it in the first place. Fucking stupid.

He approaches the Jones house with caution. The last time he came here is cause Amelia hosted a party for the end of the year, last year. It also ended up being the night she asked Lovino out on a date. He shakes that thought from his head. It doesn't matter why he came here in the past. Now he's here for Madeline. He knocks on the door harder than he means to. Sort of. Amelia answers the door, her megawatt smile beaming.

"Oh," She says, her smile slipping away to a grimace. She crosses her arms. "What do you want?" Lovino huffs.

"Where's Madeline?" He asks bitterly. He doesn't want to put off his apology any longer than he has to. He's annoyed he let it get this bad in the first place. He should have just talked to her to begin with. He can beat himself up over that later. Amelia raises an eyebrow at him.

"Why should I tell you?" She sounds just as bitter. Lovino groans and runs a hand through his hair.

"Please? Can you just tell her I'm here or something?" Lovino almost regrets how desperate he sounds. Right now he's got more important things to care about. Amelia uncrosses her arms with a scoff. She puts a hand on the door.

"Why should I? It's not like you care."

"I do care. I care so fucking much and it pisses me off how much I actually give a shit. I'm here to fucking apologize can you please just tell me where she is?" Lovino snaps at her, gesturing madly with his hands. He's got a exhausted expression on his face. He is tired. Tired of pretending he doesn't give a damn about Madeline. Amelia stares at him wide eyed. Lovino gulps.

"Please." He asks once more. He can feel angry tears at the back of his eyes. He blinks hard to get rid of them. Amelia shifts uncomfortably on her feet. She snaps her eyes to him.

"She's at the lake." Then the door is slammed in his face. Lovino takes a step back and a deep breath. He turns away from the house and walks towards the lake. It's frozen over by now. He stomps through the snow. He's cold now. Fuck. He shakes his head. All this trouble over some girl and he's actually going through it. He kicks at the snow. The last thing he needs is to worry if Madeline will just reject him now.

He scans the lake when he gets closer. He can see her. Her blonde hair swirling about her. She's skating across the thick layer of ice. Before he gets too distracted, he finds her things placed on a bench. He makes his way over to it and takes a seat by her backpack. He watches her silently. She's graceful on the ice, just like she is when she dances. Her moves are practiced and effortless. It takes him a moment, but he recognizes the pattern she's skating. It's the tango he taught her. He swallows the lump in his throat. She comes to a stop in the center. He watches as she rubs at her face. She starts the dance again.

He sits in the cold for another ten minutes, just watching her move. It's beautiful to say the least. She's more comfortable on the ice, it's easy to see. She slides with ease like she's been doing it all her life. Who knows, maybe she has. Lovino wants to find out. He wants to know everything. He doesn't even know her favorite color. He wants to know. He takes a slow breath of the frigid air. It's been so long since he's wanted to know someone, since he's cared so much. It scares him.

Madeline skates a few slow circles around the lake, a few twists and jumps here and there, and then she's skating his way. He sits up a bit straighter. She steps off the ice and into the snow. Finally she looks up to see him there. He keeps his expression blank. She pauses. He can see her take a deep breath, her expression morphing into frustration. She stomps through the snow to her bag. Lovino stays quiet as she removes her skates and quickly puts her boots on her feet. Her simply stares at her as she stands, shoulders her bag, and moves to be in front of him. They just lock eyes for a moment. Then she hits him in the head.

"HEY, what was-"

"Don't you dare ask me 'what was that for' you know darn well what you did." She folds her arms across her chest with a huff. Lovino rubs at the spot she hit him. His neutral expression breaks away to a small glare. He stands up and towers over her, by at least a few inches. She doesn't let his size affect her own glare at him. She groans.

"Why did you avoid me?" She demands from him. He opens his mouth to speak but he really doesn't have much of a logical answer. He closes his mouth with a grimace. Madeline scrunches up her nose with annoyance.

"You kiss me then you just avoid me like you're pretending you didn't. That hurt." Madeline scolds him, her voice breaking way for the pain she felt. Lovino glares at the ground. He knows he deserves it. He hates that he caused her to hurt. That's the worst of it.

"I just.. You made me feel like you really liked me. And then, you did that." Lovino peeks at her. She's still got her face twisted up into annoyance, but the threat of tears is coming. Lovino stands up straighter and softens his expression. She sniffs and rubs at her nose.

"I really like you too and that just sucked you complete doofus!" She suddenly pushes at his shoulders, knocking him back into the bench. He blinks at her. She's rubbing carelessly at her face now, trying to remove her tears and sniffling. Lovino's breathing catches. He stands once again and steps closer to her. She huffs and looks up at him, her eyes getting red around the edges. Lovino leans forward and kisses her softly.

"I'm sorry," He whispers against her lips. She sniffles in response. She's still glaring at him. Lovino can't help it. He smiles for a second.

"I'm not good with feelings," She scoffs, he rolls his eyes. "I tried to tell myself this doesn't mean anything. It doesn't matter, I don't care. Fucking hell was I wrong. I care a lot. I'm actually annoyed by how much I care." He confesses quietly. He stills sounds sour, but he feels like it won't matter. He said most of what he needed to say. Madeline sniffs again.

"You're an idiot," She tells him. He actually laughs. Softly and breathy, but he does. He looks down at her. She's still pouting at him. He kisses her again.

"I should have said something sooner."

"You really should have." She tells him taking a step back. For a second his heart stops thinking she's going to leave him standing there in the snow. She drops her bag to the ground and throws her arms around his shoulders, hugging him closer. He inhales sharply and hugs her back, burying his head in her hair. He's clinging to her, but she's clinging back, so it's okay. She pulls back and kisses him then.

"Don't you ever do that to me again or so help me I will drown you in syrup." She whispers to him. He holds her tighter at the threat. She laughs gently in his ear. It's more than he could have hoped for. She pulls him out of the snow, her bag once again over her shoulder. They hold hands on the walk back to her house. It's quiet between them. He doesn't mind. Her hand is small but warm in his.

He sees Amelia glaring from the window as they approach. She tells him to wait outside, so he does. She runs inside. Five minutes later she reappears in different clothes. She takes his hand one again and they continue walking down the sidewalk.


	7. I miss out little talks

"Tell me something I don't know about you."

"So basically anything?" Madeline rolls her eyes at the answer. Lovino sighs, running a hand through his hair.

"I like to sing."

"Will you sing for me?"

"No."

"Rude." Lovino shrugs. Madeline curls up deeper into his side.

"What's your favorite color?"

"Red. What's yours?"

"Purple."

"Why?"

"It's the color of your eyes." Madeline giggles. Lovino holds her tighter.

"Okay how about.. Do you know any other languages?"

"Parlo italiano, you?"

"Je parle francais."

"Where'd you learn that?"

"I grew up in Canada, plus papa is French. Where'd you learn Italian?"

"Grandpa taught us when we were younger." Lovino shifts on his bed to lean back a bit more. Madeline wiggles with him.

"Favorite food."

"Pancakes. Fight me. You?"

"Heh, pizza, but not that greasy fat crap."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, thinner, better toppings. I could make it better."

"Can you make me some?"

"Not right now, I don't want to move."

"Makes sense." Madeline snuggles into his shoulder. Lovino rests his head against hers.

"Favorite song."

"Oh that's not fair! You can't ask that. Ask something else."

"Ugh fine, how about favorite time of day."

"Oh I like that one. I like morning times best. You?"

"Before everyone wakes up times." Madeline hums. Lovino sighs.

"What do you want to be when you're older?"

"Business something or other. What are your plans?"

"I want to teach people how to skate."

"Where did you learn how to do that?"

"My real mother taught me before she died."

"Would it be bad of me to ask about her?"

"Nope, she died of cancer when I was six." Lovino glares at nothing in particular. Madeline plays with the edge of shirt.

"That sucks."

"I'm alright, mostly I just worry about papa. He says he's over it, but I think he gets sad still sometimes."

"Makes sense."

"Where are your parents?"

"Italy."

"Why aren't they here?"

"Not really sure."

"Does that bother you?"

"Sometimes." Madeline twists around to face him. Lovino gets caught in her eyes again.

"Why don't care about a lot of things?"

"Not sure. I've thought it might be to protect myself, but I don't know what I need protection from."

"Are you just scared?"

"Possibly." Madeline snuggles back into him. Lovino wraps his arms around her firmly.

"I told you before how I worry for Feliciano."

"Yeah."

"I worry for you too." Lovino bites his tongue. He never really thought himself worry worthy.

"You say you don't care, I think you just don't want to get hurt."

"Probably."

"Thank you." Lovino scrunches up his face. He sits up slightly to get Madeline to look up at him. She does.

"For what?"

"For taking a chance with me." She smiles gently. He leans forward and kisses her softly.

"Thank you then."

"For what?"

"For making me care." They lean back into their lax position.

"Oh favorite animal."

"I like brown bears.

"I like polar bears."

"Can you get any more Canadian?"

"Moose."

"Fuck." Madeline giggles. Lovino smiles for a second.

"What do you like to do in your free time?"

"Mostly I just skate, or I read."

"I doodle and dance."

"Can I see some of your doodles?"

"When I doodle I will show you."

"You don't have any right now?"

"They're all of you. So no." Madeline sits up to look down at him. Lovino doesn't move.

"What'd you do with that picture of me?"

"Oh, I uh. It's near my mirror in my room."

"Feliciano drew me a picture of you too."

"Really?"

"Yeah." Lovino points to the picture on the small table. Madeline hums.

"That was sweet of him."

"Yeah I guess so." Madeline leans down a kisses him gently. Lovino pulls her close to him.

"This is nice."

"We should do it more often then."

"I've never felt this comfortable with someone."

"Really?"

"In case you haven't noticed, I don't exactly have a lot of friends." She giggles. He rolls his eyes.

"I'm really comfortable with you too."

".. _really_?"

"Of course dofus. I don't feel like I have to try too hard."

"That's good right?"

"Yes, that is wonderful." She pecks his cheek softly. He sighs in content.

"Does this make us together?"

"If it doesn't then what the fuck?"

"You're so eloquent. Is that your favorite word?"

"Fucking maybe." She giggles again, snuggling close. He nuzzles into her hair.

"Okay fine, to make it official, will you be my girlfriend?"

"Sweet talk me."

"Seriously?"

"You're Italian right? You can do it."

"Is that racist?"

"Maybe stereotypical." Lovino sighs and sits up to lean on his elbow over Madeline. She's smiling gently at him.

"Madeline from the first moment I saw you I couldn't get your damn eyes out of my head."

"You're not supposed to swear during sweet talk."

"Shh don't interrupt. I couldn't stop thinking about them, and then I saw you again when you were brushing your hair and I just wanted to run my hands through it."

"Oh is that when you-"

"Yes. What did I say about interrupting? Now where was it? Hair, right, then I couldn't stop thinking about your fucking smile. Dammit no one has a right to look that gorgeous." He doesn't look away from her eyes. She covers her mouth with her hand.

"Is that all?"

"Yes I'm done."

"You're not supposed to swear in sweet talk."

"Too late now." She giggles more, removing her hand from her face. Lovino takes his chance to swoop in and kiss her gently.

"So is that yes?"

"Oh I don't know.."

"After all that shit you're just-" His words are cut off by Madeline kissing him quickly.

"Yes. All of the yes." Lovino releases a breath he didn't know he held. They snuggle late into the night. Feliciano comes up stairs telling them dinner is ready. After food, Lovino walks Madeline back to her house. He gives polite answers to a man wondering what Lovino wants with his daughter. Madeline gets entirely embarrassed. Lovino walks home in the snow, a slight smile on his face.


	8. And we danced

Lovino had no idea Madeline had her own reputation. Hearing she's known to be soft and sweet comes to no surprise to him. Hearing she's known throughout the school because of it he didn't really expect. He also didn't expect to have so many people talking about their newly formed relationship. Don't they have anything better to talk about? He sighs and closes his locker gently. It's only been a week, and fresh news means lots of gossip. He rolls his eyes. He can hear some talking about the school sweetheart dating the school bad boy.

Bad boy is such a weird term to Lovino. He's not bad. He just never really cared for anything. He did his school work and got good grades. Whoever labeled him a bad boy really didn't know anything about him. He leans up against the metal. It's cold just like outside but he doesn't mind. He scans the hallway. A mop of curly blonde hair steals his attention. Madeline comes up to him and hugs him tight. Her arms warming the coldness he felt from the lockers. He hugs her back. Leaning down to nestle his head in her hair.

"Did you want to hang out after school today?" She asks with a bright smile. Lovino pulls away to look down at her. He nods slightly. She hums and goes back to hugging him.

"Maybe we could.. dance again," He offers. She nods to that. They haven't danced in a while thanks to all the drama Lovino put them through. It's what he looks forward to during the rest of the day.

The bell rings and he almost runs out of his seat to his locker. He puts his books away and heads to the music room. Madeline is opening the door when he gets there. They enter the room. They stretch just a little and get in position. They go through the dance slowly, so Madeline can remember for sure the steps she needs to take. She watches her feet, sticking out her tongue on concentration. At the end she messes up on her footing. Lovino moves next to her and they step it out together. They speed up the tempo, dancing around the room with Madeline's laugh echoing around them.

"Can we try it with the music?" She asks enthusiastically. Lovino shrugs and heads over to the machine. He pops in the CD. The music beeps off the tempo and he runs back to his position in front of her. She fumbles at first, not used to the music or the speed. She gets it down though, feeling confident enough to peek up at him every few seconds. At the end, Lovino pulls her closer. She's giggling. Her eyes are sparkling like always. This time, Lovino feels no regret in pulling her close to kiss her deeply.


End file.
